Anxiety

When I got married at 22 I had a vague notion of anxiety. I thought it was an emotion, something you suffered from time to time based on significant events looming overhead. My experience with anxiety in college was something like this. A huge project would be underway. Perhaps on Friday we would have a pin-up (critique) in a classroom. The visiting speaker (a hot shot architect who is respected enough that he is hired by universities to come and speak) for the evening would join our class and, along with our vocal professors, give us feedback on our ideas. This is nerve wracking, it haunts you. But with time you learn a few tricks. 1) if you stay up for two days and only sleep during your non-essential classes, then you are past tired, and are complacent. the comments don't sting like you think they should because you are not thinking like you should 2) after a couple of years you're sufficiently humbled to know that you are not anyone special and you, along with everyone else, is going to be thrashed anyway (if you aren't, then your classmates give you a pat on the back afterwards) Thus anxiety, although real, was something I experienced a few times a semester, in front of a none too polite judge panel with a crowd of 15-100 people watching. Any other experience I had after that was a cake walk.
I did not know that anxiety can be part of a person's genetic makeup. That it can permeate every moment of one's life. That things like indoor recess, public bathrooms, and dental floss can be coated in it. I didn't know that abnormal or over reactions could be attributited to it. I didn't realize that anxiety is common and that a lot of people are enduring it, some vocally and most very quietly. I only this morning (at 4am to be exact) realized that anxiety can effect work ethic: you can become daunted by any seemingly difficult task and give up before you even start.
I don't know how to teach my child how to deal with it. Obviously my two steps above are not going to work when it comes to problems like having a substitute on a Tuesday. I still don't have any sympathy; I can't grasp what is really going on. I have a vague idea what must be going through his head, but I have never experienced anything remotely close to it. So, my tact has been to plow through it, ignore it, or face it only when I absolutely have to. Thankfully the Lord knows all of both sides of this story and he does give me clues and suggestions. At 4:30am after I came to understand one part of it, he gave me the outline for an action plan for combating the daily battle of homework and talent improvement. May Heaven help us so that I can do a little better everyday to fight the gene called anxiety.

Macey's playdate

 Here Macey is having a playdate with Sophia from down the street.

 These girls were doing 'voluntary' Acorn Patrol, which means I do not have to pay them for their work. The boys do Acorn Patrol for a price of 5 puffs per snack baggie filled with Acorn. 50 puffs equal $2, so you can see that I am getting off cheap, but they feel like they are making the big bucks.

 Here is the 5 gallon bucket with the already picked acorns. The season has only just begun! I could be poor before fall is over. Ryan asked where we could sell our acorns. An entrepreneur with bad product! However, if you Arizonans are thinking that acorns are just what you need for a craft project, to decorate with, or for a fun fall lesson, let me know and I'll get you some in the mail.

The girlies drawing with chalk. Sophia and Macey have regular playdates. At the last one S pulled M's hair. I have had to listen to Macey time and again as she recalls this hard time in her young life.

I wonder...

I wonder why Macey decided to sing this song? I'm thinking that Murray on Sesame Street has something to do with it. The title of this song is 'I wonder why my beltloops'. If you are unfamiliar with cub scouts then you do not recognize the belt she is wearing with the 'beltloop' awards Alex has earned displayed on it.

A battle of ships

On Friday I chalked out a dire warning for my opposing ship captains. Unfortunately, my fleet was sunk first. The victory went to team A&R. On the bright side, I had yummy cookies and bottled Dr Pepper to get me through.

Soccer pictures

End September

I decorated a little earlier than usual this year. Some of the neighbors had started so I went ahead and put mine up. Do you like the purple spider webs?

Inside I put out some of the decorations I got from super Saturday last year.

I made the wreath this year. It is so cute!

On Friday night we went camping with 2 other families. The men proceeded to night fish until midnight.

They were catching catfish.

Dan managed to bring in one!

Macey slept in until Dan had to wake her up so we could pack up. Alex had a soccer game, so we had to head back into town.

Macey enjoyed camping.

The lake is half empty because of the drought. The bank was the muddy bottom of the lake. So the boys came home very dirty. But they had a good time getting dirty with their friends.
There was only one hitch to our camping. At 7 am a group of teenagers came through camp. Unbeknown to us, there was a cross country meet at the campground and they ran around our campsite. Oh well, it was a beautiful day for a meet, and we got front row seats!

Macey fell asleep during conference on Saturday afternoon lying on top of the air hockey game. Cozy, eh? I might have dozed a bit, but I chose the couch instead!