My job has been very trying this week. How could it be? I get up when I want, get dressed when I want, eat what I want. So what makes a day full of story books and kids TV difficult? Ryan's inquisitiveness. Should I really push the blame on a small child? You're thinking, 'Well, maybe you should check out that beam in your eye first.' True, very true. I think that everyday. And then I walk in the kitchen and see Ryan sitting on the counter eating Flinstones like candy. How did he get it open? (Ok, why could he reach it?) I then go in the boys room and find their books all over the floor instead of in their handy little baskets.
Ryan has been having success with potty training. However, his leap from the baby (yes, I still call him 'baby', but he responds, 'I'm not a baby, I Ryan') to big boy has drained him mentally. He has forgotten how to get his clothes on and how to buckle his car seat straps. He is always saying 'I can't' when I know he can. He is looking for new ways for me to be involved in his life. If I don't want to change his diapers, then I have to put the couch cushions on 10x's a day, or chase him out of my make up, or clean up the water he has emptied from out of the cooler onto the kitchen floor.
Right now, I love him best at 9:30pm, when he is fast asleep. He is dead tired, and sprawled out and peaceful. Last night I dreamed that we went to some fun house and he got lost. I looked and looked and kept crying, 'I've lost my baby. Someone stole my baby. I let someone steal my baby.' I woke up and went and checked on both of my boys, sleeping peacefully.
Diligence! I must keep constant diligence! Pray more, calm down more, give more, live more!